Le Chien qui Dort

Good morning, gentle humans. Or good afternoon. I am not sure what time it is because I have been napping. And you know what they say about that:  “Let Sleeping Dogs Lie.” 
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Have you ever wondered who “they” are who say that? Well, around the year 1380 a gentle human named Chaucer wrote, “It is nought good a slepyng hound to wake.”

You remember Chaucer, I’m sure. He’s the author of that book that is required reading in Puppy School, The Canterbury Tails.

His words, however, sound a little funny. And he doesn’t know how to spell sleeping. I wonder how he got to be so famous with such terrible spelling.

Well, Chaucer wasn’t the only one to broach the subject of napping canines. No sirree-dog.  IMG_3355

In fact, a couple hundred years later in 1546 Heywood said, “It is euill wakyng of the slepyng dog.” But it’s interesting that his spelling is even worse! I would even call it atrocious!

I wonder if Chaucer and Heywood ever took part in a spelyng bee?

Well, that Olde English is a strange language. IMG_3917I actually prefer the French, who in the early 14th century advised “n’esveillez pas lou chien qui dort.” I think that is very good advice. In fact, I think I’ll go back to sleep.

Bonne nuit.

 

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Show Dog

Hello, gentle humans. I hope you are doing well. I am well, but now that the show is over (remember, I was the “mutt” Sandy in the musical Annie) I find myself missing the fame of being on stage. I especially miss being around so many wonderful cast members, all of whom loved me.

This has made me think: In what show should I next perform? In what song  should I be featured? Here are some ideas, based on my experience of these past few weeks.

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Wicked, and the song should be “Popular”

“Pupular, I’m a puppy who’s pupular,

And with an assist from me to be who you’ll be

Instead of dreary who-you-were, (well, are)

There’s nothing that can stop you from becoming pupu-ler… lar.”

 

That would be a fun show and as you can see from the photo I am indeed popular! But, maybe this would be better:

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Funny Girl, “People”

“People,

People who need puppies,

Are the luckiest people in the world,

With one puppy, 

One very special puppy, 

A feeling deep in your soul,

Says you should fill the dog bowl,

No more hunger or thirst, 

But first be a person who needs puppies.”

 

And, of course, there’s that wonderful musical about the oceans. It’s already got lots of animals, such as hermit crabs and fish, sea gulls and eels. We could add in a part for a mer-pup!

The Little MermaidBDDDCD95-16C3-4C5E-85D4-BD4BBA0BFE37 2  “I Want to be Where the People Are”

“I want to be where the people are,

I wanna see, wanna see them laughing,

Rubbing my belly and petting my fur,

That would be great, oh yes sir-

ree-dog!”

 

Well, those are some of my ideas. What do you think? Will they work? Or do you have other suggestions of shows for which I should audition? Let me know in the comments.

 

Holy Cow!

I’m back again, gentle humans. 7493716a-473b-4ea9-b99c-76d4b750b1b1.jpegToday I want to tell you about a close encounter that I recently had. No, it wasn’t a close encounter of the Third Kind. It was more of a bovine kind. Let me explain:

Dad and I were on another of our hikes up the hill. It was a beautiful evening out and we had a very nice walk. The air was cool, the breeze was soft, and the sun was starting to go down.

It was a very peaceful and happy time.

On our journey we also saw some cows. They were grazing quietly on one side of our path and they hardly paid us any attention. I have often seen cows on these hikes and they never bother us. Oh, sometimes they are curious (especially the calves, who have IMG_9762actually come up and sniffed my nose), but they mostly leave us alone.

The cows were happily eating their dinner, and we continued on up the hill.

After a while we decided that it was time to turn back. The sun was getting even lower and the trails would be closed after sunset. Although it was beautiful where we were, we headed back down to the valley.

When we got to the place where the cows were we noticed that they were now grazing on both sides of the trail. No problem, we just kept on our way. Then we noticed one cow – a cow with horns! – move away from the rest and start walking towards us. IMG_3284Was this another curious cow? We slowed down, and the cow with horns got closer. This was starting to get a little creepy, at least for dad. I was unfazed … I just wanted to keep on going.

Keep on going – that is what this cow with horns did! Holy cow, it came right up to me and lowered its head, so that those horns were pointed right at my side! Just inches away! Dad had enough. He shouted at the cow with horns to “Go Away!” (yeah, right, as if cows understand English) and then he moved us quickly down the path.

The cow with horns took one more step in our direction, then let us continue on our way.

We got home and told mom all about it. 6EEDBF53-B746-414D-B39E-903D1BE696A0She thought that maybe the cow with horns was confused, and thought that I was a lost calf. If it did, then it was a very dumb cow with horns. It is obvious that I am not a calf. I am a very clever puppy.

But if that cow with horns was intent on attacking, then I might have been a clever but hole-y puppy!

As it turned out, we got back down just as the sun was dropping below the hills to the west.  We had a nice hike, we enjoyed the terrific weather, and we survived the bovine encounter.

All was good.

I <3 My People

Greetings and salivations, gentle humans. Once again it is I, Bailey. And today I am writing to you as a very happy and clever pup, because yesterday my favorite person came to see me.

IMG_3300Yes, she is my favorite gentle human. Oh sure, I have mom, and dad, and all the rest of the family and friends whom I see more frequently.  But Nikki is the one for whom I make the biggest fuss. Whenever I see her – and this time it was on the sidewalk by the Playhouse – I go running to her and I whine and jump and want to say “Hello, my favorite of all people! I want to lick your face!”

This day she came down especially to see me in the play, Annie. Oh sure, her niece and nephew are also in the show, and her sister was the director, but I know that it was really ME that she came to see! After all, who is really the star of the show? Sure, the musical is titled Annie, but you people come to see the dog. At least, that’s what all my adoring fans keep telling me after the show is over!

IMG_1248But back to my favorite person. She came to see me. I know this because before the show we went to Rosy’s at the Beach for dinner. We sat at a table outside so that I could join her. She smiled at me and held my paw for the longest time. And she could tell that I was thirsty and even offered me a drink from her glass.

I was a very happy puppy. I was glad to see her. And afterwards, when it was showtime, I gave her the best performance that I have done so far. All my entrances were spot on and I didn’t miss a cue. And my tail was wagging the whole time! Yessir-ree-dog, it was a grand performance.

It’s also probably a good thing that I couldn’t see her in the audience. If I did, I might have broken that fourth wall and jumped into the audience to whine and say “Hi!” to her again. I just might have. After all, while it is true that I am now a famous show dog now, I still ❤ my people!

 

 

 

 

Fetch Stick Wizard

(To the tune of “Pinball Wizard”)

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Ever since I was a young pup

I’ve loved to play with sticks,

On the front lawn or the backyard,

That’s how I got my kicks,

Bet you ain’t seen nothin’ like it,

iPhone 003It’s really fantastic,

This clever and fast dog 

Sure plays a mean “Fetch Stick.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rx for Reading

Hello once again, gentle humans. It is I, Bailey. You know … the clever puppy. Yes, I’m so clever that I can write my own blog!

Many of you have told me that I write very well. Thank you for those kind words. I know, for example, that dad is very jealous of my writing ability. He wishes that he could write as well.

IMG_3244One of the ways for a pup to learn about writing is to read. I do that. I read a lot. I love books, especially books about dogs. You can find puppies in all the finest literature, such as Poky Little Puppy and Go, Dog. Go! I am especially fond of the latter one because the dog is quickly going here, or there. Just like I do! After all, I am speed, remember?

I am certainly not Poky!

These titles bring up an interesting point. Many of you gentle humans think that Go, Dog. Go! was written by a doctor whose last name is Seuss. Actually, the author and illustrator is P.D. Eastman. But the style is so like that of Dr. Seuss that he often gets the credit.

I do like the writing of this Dr. Seuss. Unfortunately, he is best known for writing that story about the big purry thing in that hat. But he also wrote some of my favorites, such as Green Eggs and Ham!

“Would you eat them in a box?”

Of course I would. I love to eat.

“Would you eat them with a fox?”

Only if he would share with me.

“Would you, could you, on a train?”

Yes! I wish dad would take me on a train ride!

“Would you, could you, on a plane?”

I don’t think planes are safe places for dogs right now.

 

Another of my Dr. Seuss favorite books is Oh, the Places You’ll Go!  IMG_2918This story is all about growing up to be a big dog, and the places that you’ll go and the things that you’ll see. It is a very nice book and dad often read it to his daughters when they were growing up. In fact, it was just like this picture where the father dog is reading to his little pup.

Of course, I don’t know if that is quite the same version that dad’s family would remember.

There is one final book by Dr. Seuss, published posthumously in 2013, titled What Pet Should I Get? Screen Shot 2018-04-27 at 11.55.08 PMIn this story a boy and a girl are trying to decide what kind of animal they should have for a pet. Should they get a nice puppy or a purry-thing? Maybe they should get a Yent (it sleeps in a tent)! The path takes them to all kinds of exotic creatures, but in the end they choose …

… a dog. A nice, friendly, and probably clever dog.

It just goes to show that – although he did write that story about the purry-thing in the hat – Dr. Seuss did prefer dogs. Why wouldn’t he?

 

 

 

Earth Day Thoughts

Hey there, gentle humans. Do you know what today is? Yes, you’re right … it’s Earth IMG_3159 2Day. Did you really know that, or did you get the hint from the title of this post? Regardless, today is the day to demonstrate support for protecting our planet’s environment.  It was also a beautiful day to get out and take a hike to enjoy our planet and all of its wonders.

That is exactly what dad and I did. We went for a nice hike and took time to consider what it means to protect our environment, and for whom we are protecting it.

I found one answer right away. We are protecting the environment for the animals. No, I don’t mean IMG_3149 2for domestic puppies like me. I mean for the animals such as the squirrel who lives in this hole in the ground. You gentle humans shouldn’t go around polluting the soil so that he can’t find good food, or places to live, or things like that. After all, without squirrels life would be pretty boring for fast and clever puppies such as myself. Without squirrels, whom would we dogs chase? Without squirrels, at whom would we bark when they climb trees?

I think that you see what I mean …

But it isn’t just the squirrels who need our protection. I know it sounds odd, but even those creatures whom you gentle humans consider evil deserve a safe and healthy place to live. For example, spiders, and rats, and even rattlesnakes! IMG_3160 2Yes, snakes are good for the environment and we need to watch out for them as well.

Dad spotted this rattler on the trail. He was out lying on the asphalt, soaking up the warmth of the sun. He wasn’t bothering anybody, and so we didn’t bother him. I’m not very interested in snakes, but dad seems to like them. I heard him say once that he and mom have had several different snakes before as pets, such as garter snakes and king snakes and corn snakes, and they even “baby-sat” a boa constrictor for a couple of weeks.

I  don’t get it. How could a snake make a good pet? They’re certainly not as clever as a puppy like me. They don’t show affection like a puppy, and they don’t sit in your lap like a puppy. Well, I will grant you that a boa constrictor might like to give you a hug, but that’s not the same thing. I just don’t get it.

But I did get distracted. Back to Earth Day …

One thing that I was very happy to see was no sign of any littering. IMG_3156 2You gentle humans are evidently doing a very good job of throwing away your trash into the garbage cans. Good for you. I didn’t see any litter anywhere. No soda cans, no candy wrappers, no junk strewn about. You obviously are throwing it all away in these trash cans.

Or maybe you are not using as many things that need to be thrown away. Cutting back on items made of styrofoam or plastic is even better than properly disposing of them.

Look at me, for example. I never use a plastic straw. These things are bad for the environment and can be deadly for animals who ingest them. Besides, I find it hard to drink through a straw. I prefer to get my water directly from a bowl or from a hose. We clever puppies don’t need straws.

Well, we finally finished our Earth Day hike and I found a nice shady place in which to rest. 76093B2E-9843-4A20-9CAE-F0A0D998C3D7 2I was hot, and tired, and got some water from a faucet (without using a straw). And then we went home … in a car.

I know, cars are bad for the environment because they use all that oil and fossil fuels. At least dad has a hybrid, so that is better. But it still takes gasoline, and therefore isn’t entirely green.

Mom and dad also have horses. I don’t see why they don’t hitch them up to a wagon and get around town that way? That would be great! I could sit up front like a Dalmatian on a horse-drawn fire engine. It would be a lot of fun!

Besides, I could bark at all the squirrels as we passed them. Yessiree pup, that would be dandy. I’ll have to bark to dad about this idea. If you agree with me, please leave a comment. With enough of you supporting me I bet that we can get him to do this!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Opening Night!

IMG_3056Wow, last night sure was exciting! Good morning, gentle humans. Thanks for taking the time to look at my blog today. As you read before, I am in the SVCT production of Annie, Jr. and my role is Sandy. Last night was our opening performance! It was a dog-tastic evening!

IMG_3106It was a new experience to see my picture on the theater marquee and my name listed in the lobby with the rest of the cast photos. I felt like a star, and I hadn’t even taken the stage for the first time yet! I felt so happy during the warm-ups that I rolled around on the stage – just like I did during the final dress rehearsal – to release some energy and get into the proper mood for performing.

Then I went to the green room with the rest of the cast to await my first entrance. Actually, it’s not green at all, and if you want the truth it isn’t even a room! The cast gathered in the alley behind the theater where we had chairs and drinks and snacks, and that is where we rested and waited for our call to go on stage.

Finally it was time for my appearance. I waited in the wings on stage right, and BBF0896E-5777-4B7F-B63C-7F453B8693AEwhen I heard my cue I ran onto the stage – and froze. There were people out there in the audience – LOTS of gentle humans and kids! I think that I had stage fright, or at least stage nervousness. I wasn’t expecting a full house, and I wasn’t sure what to do. Luckily our “Annie” was able to come to me and continue with the scene, and when she finished singing “Tomorrow” I went off-stage.

I did better for my last scene. When I came out the audience applauded and I went to “Annie” and laid down in her lap. It was an awww moment, and the crowd loved it. We even got a standing ovation at the end! Then the show was over and it was time to greet my adoring fans.

166735C1-E1FF-4C44-BFDA-12EC1533DCE2This was the best part of the night! I went around to the theater door and greeted all the patrons as they exited. They all wanted to pet me and tell me that I was the best performer in the show! I stayed there for a long time, until dad came to take me home.

I heard that the rest of the cast went out to a restaurant afterwards to celebrate the successful opening. They asked if I was going, too. But I was too tired to join them. I went back to the house and curled up on my bed.

It was a long night, an exciting night, a night that I will always remember. Now I get to rest and prepare for the next performance, which is next weekend. I hope that I don’t have butterflies in my stomach next time.

No, you silly gentle humans, I have NOT been eating butterflies. That is just silly … and gross.

Rehearsals are Hard Work!

Good morning, gentle humans! Here I am again, Bailey the clever pup, but this time I am a very tired and restful pup. This has been a very busy week of rehearsals for the show that I am in, “Annie” and I am exhausted! Rehearsals are hard work!

IMG_2920Here are some photos from the rehearsals. This will give you an idea of just how much work it really is.

Here I am with Melanie. She plays the role of the officer who thinks that I am a stray pup on the street. Of course, I’m not really a stray, so I have to pretend to be one. What is a stray like? How does he think? What is his motivation? I guess that is what acting is all about.

Anyway, we are waiting Stage Right to make our entrance.
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And here I am on stage. Tegan is Annie and she has just rescued me from the police officer. She does this by telling the officer that I am really her dog and that my name is Sandy. When she calls me by my new name I go running to her – I am doing a really good job of acting in this role – and then she starts singing a song about Tomorrow.

Tegan does a wonderful job acting as well. Just like I’m not a stray, she is not really an orphan. And I know that because …

Screen Shot 2018-04-06 at 8.45.20 AMThis photo was taken by Tegan’s real mom, Liana. She caught dad and me taking a break during the rehearsals. There are lots of different scenes in the show and I am only in a few of them – the best ones, of course – but only a few. So when I am not on stage I get to take a break.

Do you like my costume? All actors are supposed to wear a costume. It helps make them look like the person (or puppy) that they are trying to portray. My costume hides my collar, because a really stray wouldn’t be wearing a collar. I wonder if I will have to wear any make-up as well?

We practiced the finale over IMG_2975and over last night. We had to keep doing it until we all got it right. It was hard work, but to keep the spirits up for the other actors I gave them some encouragement. Here I am discussing my blocking with Leah, who plays Grace Farrell, Mr. Warbucks’ personal secretary. Leah is also Mason’s girl. I told you about the Mason before; he is the other clever pup with whom I will be sharing this role. And after seeing how tiring it is to be in a musical like this, I am very glad that there will be two of us dogs to carry the workload!

IMG_2981As I mentioned, we practiced this finale over, and over, and over again. Each time the director and choreographers refined the blocking, and added more hand movements, and then we ran it again.

I tried my best to do my part. At times would improvise to make it more interesting; I think that the director liked that, because she would laugh every time I did something new. I’m very good at improv … it comes natural for a clever pup like me!
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We kept running that scene, as I said, over and over and over. And by the time it was finally over, Tegan had changed out of her costume, and I collapsed, exhausted, into her lap. It was a very hard day’s night for this thespian puppy. And as soon as we were finally done I went home and fell asleep on my bed.

Rehearsals are hard work!

But, after a few days off, we’ll be back at it again next week. And next time, we will be rehearsing in the theater! I can’t wait. This is what I have always dreamed of! The Glitter, the Limelight! The Roar of the Greasepaint, the Smell of the Crowd!

Rehearsals are hard work, but yessir-ree dog, they are worth it!

 

A BIG Dog

IMG_1701Greetings again, gentle humans.  It is I, Bailey, the clever and apparently too big puppy.  I say “apparently too big” because I went in for my physical a few months ago, and found out that my vet thought that I was overweight.

Here I am in the waiting room. Do I look like a big dog? Do I look like a TOO big dog?

IMG_8856Before the vet saw me the technician had me stand on the scale. I was a good puppy and sat quietly while the technician read the weight. Then she took that reading and wrote it down on my chart.
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The scale read 100 lbs.  Is that a lot? It’s a nice round number, but I would have to wait for my vet to tell me what he thought. That was where I went next … into the examining room.

IMG_8204My vet was Dr. Switzer and I really like him. He checked me all over and told me that I was a very healthy puppy.

But the only problem was that I was overweight. He wanted me to lose at least 10-15 pounds!

Wow, that’s a lot of weight to take off! Can you imagine how many doggie treats that is? How many bowls of ice cream?

Well, he told dad that I should be put on a strict diet of weight-control kibble, and to carefully give me only as much as the chart said to. I also had to cut back on snacks, and treats, and other yummies. And finally, I had to get out and exercise more.

The last part – the exercise – is good, because I love going on long hikes with dad. We made a pact to do this even more often. And, although I am always looking for more snacks to eat, I really have been good – well, at least, sort of good. And it is all paying off. On my most recent check-up I was down to 93 lbs!

Soon I will be a clever and svelte puppy!