Daily Archives: June 22, 2012

The Magic Kingdom

A friend of my dad’s wrote on his Facebook page:

Bailey is quite an impressive pup! I read several of his blog posts and I can see you have your hands full keeping up with him!!” – Julie R.

Although I’ve never met Julie, I can tell that she is a very smart and perceptive person.  Yes, dad has trouble keeping up with me.  After all, a) he can’t run as fast as I can (I Am Speed, remember?), b) he never knows what mischief I will get into next inside the house, and c) he certainly can’t keep up with my intelligence and blogging ability.

Dad met Julie at some place called Disneyland.  It claims to be “The Happiest Place on Earth,” but how can this be?  It certainly isn’t a happy place for dogs.

Photo credit: Fishbulb

Well, it is if you are a very special dog, like this guide dog whose photo was posted on MiceChat.com:


Isn’t she beautiful?  She was able to go to Disneyland because she was a) a guide dog, helping her special human, and b) she was wearing Minnie Mouse ears.

But they won’t let in a clever pup like me, even if I wore mouse ears or a Goofy hat.

How can they call this place “happy”?? It dogscriminates and won’t let us puppies enter.

I think that I will use my intelligence and go to law school (maybe Puperdine or UC Barkley) when I grow up and earn my J.D. (Juris Doggie) degree.  Then I will become a legal advocate for all canines at Disneyland.  We dogs will have our day in the Park!  They WILL let us in!  After all, we dogs have rights, too!  And leashes!

And then I will take up the legal fight for other pups.

One of the first dogs for whom I will seek legal recourse is this poor fellow who has been working at Disneyland for 45 years with hardly any time off.  Not only that, but he has been working for much less than the minimum wage.  He should be getting at least 10 bones/hour for his employment.  Plus vacations.  And potty-breaks.  (Note for Disneyland guests:  Want to know the real reason why you shouldn’t go into that water???!!!)

Yes, someday I’ll do all that.  Someday, I’ll go to Disneyland.  Can you imagine me there?  A water dog like me would love Splash Mountain.  Chasing cars on the Autopee-a.  Sniffing noses with Pluto.

Someday  …  someday.  All I need is a dream, happy thoughts, and some pixie dust.