Monthly Archives: November 2012

Tails from the Old West

“This town ain’t big enough for the both of us and I’m going to give you 24 hours to get out.”

That’s right, you purry-thing.  This is MY dad and you can’t just butt in and grab some of his attention for yerself.

I don’t care if  you were here first.  This here is my  territory and you had best stay away, if’n ya know what’s good fer ya.

I don’t care if  you like to jump in his lap and purr.  I’m bigger, and they don’t call me The Lapdog Kid for nothin’!

I don’t care if  you have the sharpest, fastest claws in the West …  …  well, maybe I do, but still …

So, just like they said in that old Western*“This town ain’t big enough for the both of us …”  You had better start a-movin’ along.

* Dear gentle humans:  Can you name the movie from which this quote comes?  Extra credit if you can name it without googling … 



The Second Time (not so nice)

ARF!  ARF ARF!  It was back … IT WAS BACK! 

I don’t think that mom and dad understood me.  All they knew is that I wanted to go outside.  So they opened to door and let me out.

THERE IT WAS!  It was eating the food that had been put out for the backyard purry-things to eat.  I chased it.  It ran.  A little.  Then it stopped.  I ran.  I got to where it was.  And then it happened.

I ran over to the lawn and started rolling and rolling.  It smelled awful, simply awful.  I couldn’t get away from it … couldn’t get the smell of of me.

Mom opened the back door and looked out,  “Phew,” she called to dad, “do you smell a skunk? And where is the dog?”

“He’s OK,” dad replied, “He’s over on the lawn.  Wait a minute … why is he rolling around so much?  Uh oh … … uh oh !!! !!!”

Do you remember a few months when I first saw this black-and-white monster?  At that time, dad warned me about chasing them.  Here is when I posted about that first introduction:

Well, I guess I didn’t listen very well, and now I know why I should stay away from these nasty, smelly creatures.  But the worst was yet to come.  Mom and dad wouldn’t let me back into the house.  Instead, they came outside with some buckets of water (luckily, it was warm water) and started throwing it onto my face!  Then they got the doggie shampoo and started giving me a bath, right there.  Right THEN!  It was cold outside … about 40 degrees, I was told.  But still they insisted that it was bath time. Brrr!

Finally they dried me off and I came inside to warm up and finish drying.  I immediately curled up on my bed and tried to sleep.

But I could still smell that horrible smell.  It was mostly on my nose and on my neck and on the top of my head.  Somehow I was able to avoid getting sprayed in my eyes — I don’t know how I did that but I sure am glad that I did!

Phew … mom was right.  It smelled awful – even worse that awful!

The next day was warmer outside, and dad gave me another bath.  With more warm water.  This time he washed me all over, trying to get off more of that smell.  Then he took a towel and dried me off (and immediately after mom took that towel and threw it into the garbage can).  I looked a lot cleaner.  My coat felt a lot smoother.  But I didn’t smell a lot better.

So the next day they took me to the big pet store — I love going into that place — to get a professional bath.  I had a great time and loved all the attention.  They washed me, and dried me, and put on some deodorant … and it seemed to work … a little.  But if you get really close, you can still smell it.  And if I get wet (as I did a few days later when it rained outside) you can definitely get a reminder of my encounter with the skunk.

I guess that it will take a few weeks, or months, for the smell to go away completely.  By then I will smell like a dog again.  By then people will pet me without wrinkling their noses.  And by then, maybe, I will have forgotten all about this lesson that I learned about black-and-white visitors …



Yes, gentle humans, I am glad that I was not born a turkey.  Turkeys are not clever, or fast … they just make funny noises.  And taste good, too.  I’m thankful  that mom often gives me pieces of turkey, or chicken, or roast beef, when she is cooking dinner.  There are lots of things that I am thankful about.  Here are ten others:

1. I am thankful for those quiet times when I can get brushed and pampered. Love being scratched on the head, and getting belly rubs! Ahhhhh!

2. I am thankful for lots of things to eat, and besides the occasional scraps there is also the purry food that I can get into when nobody is looking.

3. I am thankful that I can run, and run fast, because I love to run (after all, I am speed)!

4. I am thankful for cool sprinklers on a hot summer day.  Oh, what fun!

5. I am NOT  thankful for skunks! (Oh, I haven’t told you about that yet, have I? Stay tuned for an update soon … it wasn’t pleasant.)

6. I am thankful for squeaky toys.  Squeaky chickens are great, and so are squeaky balls, and squeaky bones, and squeaky killer whales.  The squeakier, the better.

7. I am thankful for vets who take good care of me.  Especially when I was very, very sick last year and had to spend a week in the hospital.  A big thanks to Dr. Clark!    (note: Would be even more thankful if there were no shots.)

8. I am thankful for my purry friends, even that white purry-thing who hisses and makes a fuss.  But some purry-things are nice to me, and come up to say hello every time that I go into the back yard. They get my special thanks.

9. I am thankful for long walks, be they on dusty trails or nice, green grass. I love climbing the hills where I can watch cows and chase squirrels, and look down at the wonderful view.

10. But mostly, I am thankful for a nice family, and a nice place to rest my head, and a wonderful home where I can play, and run, and be loved.

Yes, I think that I must be the luckiest clever puppy in the world.  As Trixie would say, “Life is good.” 

Dog vs. Machine

Slowly it approached, its sinister appearance in stark contrast to the lush surroundings which it was mutilating. The noise of its wicked blades was deafening and all fled from its onslaught … all, that is, except for this brave, clever puppy, who ran circles around it, heedless of the dangers that it presented, until I suddenly stopped right in front of it, daring it to advance.

It stopped. 

And then this puppy – this brave, clever, and proud puppy – knew that I had won.  I had stopped the advance of The Machine, halted its relentless course of chomping through the beautiful, green, long grass.

At first I just stared at it.  I couldn’t figure out what dad was doing, pushing this machine back and forth.  He wasn’t running, or playing, he was just walking.  Back and forth.  Boring.

There had to be more to it, so I took a closer look.  Nope.  Didn’t smell like anything interesting. Not interesting at all.

So I left it alone.  Dad might like walking behind this noisy, boring thing, but I had lost interest.  I ran off to the other side of the lawn and lay down to enjoy the warm day.  I hear that Winter is coming, and soon there won’t be any more nice days like this.

But then I started wondering.  Pretty soon dad and his machine were going to get to the hole in the lawn that I had dug (and re-dug, when dad tried to fill it in).  What would happen when the wheels of that machine got to the hole?  Would it fall in?

Well, it didn’t.  I was impressed with the way that dad navigated around that depression.  It was obvious to me that it wasn’t big enough.  Not deep or wide enough.  I will need to get to work and dig some more.  Maybe the next time that he mows the lawn the machine will fall in and disappear.

Now THAT  would be interesting!


Puppy Non Grata

I was aghast!  I was in shock!  Gentle humans, you can imagine my horror when I saw this sign:

Can you believe it?

It was bad enough that they wouldn’t allow puppies in the PLAY area … after all, that is what puppies love to do.  But even worse was to associate the NO PUPPIES sign with the BAILEY Fence Company!

That is like adding insult to injury!  Grrrr!

Well, I was a good puppy (hey … I’m always a good puppy — that’s what mom and dad say) and I kept out of the fenced area.  But that didn’t mean that I didn’t play … I played on the lawn OUTSIDE of the supposed play area.

Just wait.  Just wait until I grow up some more and finish school and get my J.D. degree (Juris Doggie).  Then I will take this to the legal system, and get them to change that sign.  Yup, that’s just what I’ll do.  The new sign will say:

“Absolutely No Purry-Things Allowed in Play Area.”