Dad’s got a problem … a hairy problem. You see, his barber has retired. Ray-the-Barber had been cutting hair in the same location in San Martin for 329 dog-years, and finally decided to retire! Yup, on December 24 he cut his last head of hair.
So now, what is dad to do for a haircut? He hasn’t gotten a haircut or a trim since Christmas Eve, and he is starting to show the effects of that negligence. His hair is starting to get a little long.
Not as long as mine, of course. His hair isn’t that long, yet. And even if it was, he wouldn’t look as good as I do with long hair.
For example, look at this photo that was taken a year BEFORE mom and dad got married. I know, the resolution of this old photograph is not very good (I’m surprised that cameras were even invented way back then!) but you can see that he has quite a shaggy mop on the top of his head. I have a fear that, without a barber, dad may look like that again.
I mean, he won’t look that YOUNG again, but his hair will look like something from the early 70s. Maybe like a hippie??!! I don’t know if I could put up with that!
And what happens if — after a little while — he still hasn’t gotten it cut? I have glimpsed the future, and it doesn’t look pretty. Dad may become a reclusive, long-haired mysterious old hermit. One who goes around spouting nonsensical gibberish. One who goes back Into the Woods.
That would really creep me out. I think that is a future that must be avoided at all costs.
We MUST prevent this future from happening! We must keep dad from letting his hair grow so long!
So, please help me in this campaign! SAVE the DAD! Let’s find him a barber! Do you have any suggestions? I’ve already gotten a couple of recommendations. One is for a barber in someplace called Seville — I think that would be a little too far to go. Another is for some chap named Sweeney Todd (I’ve also heard that’s a great guy for a puppy to know — he’s got tasty treats for us dogs to eat).
Let’s find dad a barber. Otherwise, I may have to try cutting his hair myself! I’m sure that I can manage that electric hair trimmer …. the one that mom got for the horses!